Monday, July 19, 2010

Recorder Proposals

This is a letter to the American Recorder Society that includes three proposals and rationale for trying to increase awareness and interest in playing the recorder:

Proposals to the American Recorder Society to Promote an Enhanced Awareness and Appreciation of the Recorder

July 2010

Proposal One: That the American Recorder Society (ARS) actively, deliberately, and rigorously encourage the appropriate state music teacher associations and/or interscholastic activities associations that host solo and small ensemble competitions to include and encourage early music competitors (including recorder soloists, duets, consorts, and early music mixed consorts, as well as early music recorder consorts and mixed consorts as accompanists for solo and small group choral competitions.)

Proposal Two: That the ARS create a competition nationally as well as regionally or statewide for those states and regions that do not have music teacher associations and/or interscholastic activities associations willing to host such competitions. Ideally, these competitions could include scholarships as prizes for encouraging strong, active participation.

Proposal Three: That the ARS and many of its local affiliates offer free annual membership for one or two years to a small, select group of top high school and college students as recommended by their music teachers – selecting strong musicians and inviting them to add playing the recorder to their musical repertoire. In addition, the ARS or its affiliates will either donate (or loan) both soprano and alto recorders to these select students during the time of their membership.

Rationale: I suggest that the targeting of our top high school and college musicians to learn the recorder and/or other early music instruments has the best chance of changing and enhancing the image and awareness of playing the recorder.

Goal: To create an atmosphere where top young musicians view playing the recorder as a legitimate, and challenging instrument, and where other high school students look up to these top musicians and also become interested in learning to play recorders for individual, consort or mixed consort playing.

Origin: In response to ARS’s Play the Recorder theme in March, the ARS successfully extended the World’s Largest Concert annual elementary school concert to include recorder accompaniment.

Problem: Unfortunately, while I applaud this effort, it has the disadvantage like a double-edged sword of reinforcing also the notion that the recorder is basically an elementary pre-band toy music instrument.

Solution: The three proposals above attempt to counter the notion that the recorder is basically for elementary students only, and to create an interest among the best of our young musicians to include early music and the recorder specifically into their music preferences, with the compound effect that these musicians would then serve as role models in creating an awareness and appreciation by their peers and parents.

Key Components:
1. Encourage strong music students to add the recorder to what is already a strong music base, rather than trying to hope that elementary students will continue playing the recorder.
2. Seek to create musical recognition for the recorder by establishing or adding recorder competitions for top high school musicians.
3. Emphasize importance in the minds of high school musicians by attaching recorder abilities to scholarship money for college.
4. Students be actively recruited annually to join local ARS chapters – and framing this invitation as a reward for high musical achievement .
5. That student membership in local ARS chapters be aided by initial suspension of membership fees and help in obtaining access to recorders – particularly beyond the soprano.

Challenges to ARS:
1. Develop working relationship on a state-by-state and region-by-region basis with music teacher associations and/or interscholastic activities associations to set up to include and encourage early music competitors. (Proposal One)
2. Establish early music competitions for high school students in states and/or regions where music teacher associations and/or interscholastic activities associations are not willing or able to do so. (Proposal Two)
3. Establish a national early music competition for high school students based on regional and/or state winners. (Proposal Two)
4. To encourage/direct/facilitate local ARS chapters working with their local public and private high schools to invite top musicians to their local ARS chapter. (Proposal Three)
5. To find financial support to fund scholarships and providing of recorders. (Proposals Two and Three)

Thursday, July 8, 2010

And On the Seventh Day …

This was written at a time when I was a school district athletic director:

Recently, biblical historians were thrilled at the discovery of a completely unknown text of the creation story in Genesis that included an astonishing additional text never before seen. It seems to put the creation story in a whole, new profound perspective. Below is the traditional text supplemented with the new discovery:

The traditional, known text from Genesis:

And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. And God saw that the light was good; and God separated the light from darkness. God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And there was evening and there was morning, one day.

And God said, “Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it separate the waters from the waters.” And God called the firmament Heaven. And there was evening and there was morning, a second day.

And God said, “Let the waters under the heavens be gathered together into one place, and let the dry land appear.” And it was so. God called the dry land Earth, and the waters that were gathered together he called Seas. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, a third day.

And God said, “Let there be lights in the firmaments of the heavens to separate the day from the night; and let them be for signs and for seasons and for days and years, and let them be lights in the firmament of the heavens to give light upon the earth.” And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, a fourth day.

And God said, “Let the waters bring forth swarms of living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the firmament of the heavens.” So God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that moves, with which the waters swarm, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, a fifth day.

And God said, “Let the earth bring forth living creatures according to their kinds: cattle and creeping things and beasts of the earth according to their kind. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God saw everything that he had made, and behold , it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, a sixth day.

The newly discovered supplemental text:

And on the seventh day, God intended to rest. But there came to him the softball coach with great expectations of compliance and preparation from which great games were to be played. And God groaned, and sent forth his people to meet these immediate expectations. And God saw that it was OK.

And on the eighth day, God was again confronted by the softball coach with further immediate demands. And God groaned louder – threatening to shake the heavens and the earth – but yet restrained himself. And God saw and began to wonder.

And on the ninth day, God saw the softball coach approaching, groaned and roared and brought forth great winds and rains – thus canceling the day’s game. And God saw that it was good and so for forty days and forty nights the rains continued to pour till the fields and diamonds were covered fully with water. And then God finally rested ...

Be Sure & Cancel Your Credit Cards Before...

The following email was received. My response and that of others follow after it.

Subject: Be sure & cancel your credit cards before you die.

A lady died this past January, and Citibank billed her for February & March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then added late fees & interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now it's somewhere around $60.00.

A family member placed a call to Citibank:

Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you that she died in January."
Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees & charges still apply."
Family Member: "Maybe you should turn it over to collections."
Citibank: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."
Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"
Citibank: "Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau; maybe both!"
Family Member: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"
Citibank: "Excuse me?"
Family Member: "Did you just get what I was telling you . . . the part about her being dead?"
Citibank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor"

Supervisor gets on the phone.

Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."
Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees & charges still apply."
Family Member: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"
Citibank: (Stammer) "Are you her lawyer?"
Family Member: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given)
Citibank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"
Family Member: "Sure. It's ..."

After they get the fax ...

Citibank: "Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what more I can do to help."
Family Member: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don't think she will care."
Citibank: "Well, the late fees & charges do still apply."
Family Member: "Would you like her new billing address?"
Citibank: "That might help."
Family Member: "Odessa Memorial Cemetery, Highway 129, Plot Number 69."
Citibank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"
Family Member: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"

What fun it is dealing with "customer service"

Tom

"EMF" made the following annotations.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
This transmission may contain information that is privileged, confidential and/or exempt from disclosure under applicable law. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any disclosure, copying, distribution, or use of the information contained herein (including any reliance thereon) is STRICTLY PROHIBITED. If you received this transmission in error, please immediately contact the sender and destroy the material in its entirety, whether in electronic or hard copy format. Thank you.

My wife relayed my response to a family member:


Here is Kim's take on it:
I think it is important to allow for time for technology to work out the kinks when they put in a new automated system.

Surely, something as new as people dying can't be expected to be worked into an automated system overnight.

It is my suspicion that eventually, some of the people who helped design the system might themselves die as well, in which case, they could well begin to understand and better perceive the valid concerns and needs of dead people not always keeping current with their day-to-day financial obligations.

In my particular case, I have decided that such hassles are extremely difficult to avoid upon becoming dead, and so have decided that I will either forego ever dying, or at least postpone it until technology has had adequate time to become familiar that the concept exists that eventually we won't exist -- but of course by that time, their system will most likely be dead, having been replaced by an even more extensive, all-inclusive technologically newer system.

Kim


Family member, Theresa's response to my wife, and relayed to me:


Ok..... Either he is eating schrooms, is a pocket philosopher or missed his calling as a lawyer who could argue that the sky is green and the grass is blue.

Theresa
Tax Compliance Technician Permit Unit


My response:

Response #1:

Dear Mastercard and Visa,

Upon my death, please cancel my credit card account -- as I will be preoccupied (probably fighting fire day and night -- but possibly arranging clouds or polishing gold pavement) and most likely unable to continue monthly payments.

In the event that I might owe you any money upon the time of my death, please feel free to either cancel said debt, or feel free to try to obtain payment from either of my kids, lol!! Good luck getting them to pay their old man's bill ...

If you are unable to track my death through the local newspaper's obituary column, please feel free to assume that upon no payment from me for two consecutive months constitutes my death, and proceed with the cancellation of my account, as long as it includes cancellation of my indebtedness as well.

Most sincerely,
One of your alive customers -- if at least only momentarily.

Response #2:

In regard to the following message found at the end of this chain of
emails:
"'EMF' made the following annotations.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"This transmission may contain information that is privileged, confidential and/or exempt from disclosure under applicable law. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any disclosure, copying, distribution, or use of the information contained herein (including any reliance thereon) is STRICTLY PROHIBITED. If you received this transmission in error, please immediately contact the sender and destroy the material in its entirety, whether in electronic or hard copy format. Thank you."

Dear Idaho Tax Compliance Technician,

I felt privileged to receive these emails and therefore have reason to believe that perhaps I have been an unintended recipient of the transmission below -- for surely it must be in error -- for I would never zoom from the effects of schrooms, nor is it a philosopher that one can see bulging from my pocket. Please note that in an effort to be in compliance with Idaho state law, I am making (somewhat) immediate contact with the sender(s) and am willing to destroy their computers and harddrives in its entirety upon receipt of address and location of said computers and harddrives, as well as setting fire to any near by papers (in the event that they might be formatted hard copies of said email.)

In the event that I do not receive such address and location information, I feel that I am ethically -- if not legally -- absolved of any further obligations regarding this matter of unintended email reception.

Sincerely,
A former Idaho income tax payer who has since re-located outside of your
tax-collecting boundaries.


My wife's response:

I hope her emails are scanned, and the authorities don't take your comment about destroying their computers seriously, and show up at my door to arrest you for your terrorist ways . . .

Friday, July 2, 2010

Going Out with "the Guys"

From: K Wardwell [mailto:kwardwell@glacierview.net]
Sent: Friday, July 02, 2010 11:45 AM
To: Dave
Cc: Annie Wardwell
Subject: Meridian Speedway


Dave,

Going to the Meridian Speedway with the guys sounds good.

My wife has given me permission to go out and be one of "the guys." She is even contemplating giving me permission to drink more than one beer and to belch -- hell, maybe even one vigorous enough to the point of being classified as a full-fledged burp ...

I am not sure she will let me ogle women walking by, but I am sure she will allow me to leer with subtle side glances, but no staring directly, nor am I allowed to stare at any woman's chest while trying to strike up a conversation.

She did say that I could scratch my belly in public - though she would prefer that it not be while burping at the same time -- provided I was with "the guys" and not around her.

Kim

My wife's response when cc'd a copy of this email to Dave:

Glad you have all of the rules straight. Men are so hard to train . . .

Urgent Payment Confirmation

Below is the "paste and copy" of a series of responses to another of those chronic "scam" emails -- often from Nigeria -- trying to entice some nameless email recipient into losing their bank account in the vain effort to receive millions of unearned dollars.

RE: Urgent Payment Confirmation:

-----Original message-----
From: "Jennet Michael"jenetm4@centbk.org
Date: Thu, 1 Jul 2010 19:53:06 -0700
To: undisclosed-recipients:
Subject: Re: Urgent Payment Confirmation:


Re: Urgent Payment Confirmation:

Attention Beneficiary,

Did You Permit Mr. Jerry Richard To Claim Your Approved $5.5 millon Inheritance Payment On Your Behalf?

Mr. Jerry Richard Told Mr. Jaiye Ebinisi That You Appointed Him To Represent You On The Claiming Of Your $5.5 millon Inheritance Payment, Mr. Jaiye Ebinisi Is About Releasing Your $5.5 millon Inheritance Payment To Mr. Jerry Richard As Soon As He Complies With The Mandatory $198.00 Courier Fee For The Delivery Of Your $5.5 million ATM Card To His Address At 100 Eggerding Dr., Cincinnati, OH 45215 USA As Your Representative.

Urgently Confirm To Mr Jaiye Ebinisi Whether Yes You Permitted Mr. Jerry Richard To Pay The Courier Fee Inorder To Claim Your $5.5millon ATM Card Payment On Your Behalf Or No You Shall Be Paying The Courier Fee Yourself In order To Claim Your $5.5 millon ATM Card Payment As The Legal Beneficiary.

Send Your Confirmation To Mr. Jaiye Ebinisi (Debt Settlement Officer)
His Email:( jaiyeebinisi2344@yahoo.co.jp )

You MUST Reconfirm Your Full Names, Address And Telephone To Mr. Jaiye Ebinisi For Verification.

Your Immediate Confirmation Is Highly Needed.
Jenet E. Michael.
Payment Confirmation Dept.


-----Original Message-----
From: K Wardwell [mailto:kwardwell@glacierview.net]
Sent: Thursday, July 01, 2010 11:16 PM
To: jenet4@ymail.com
Subject: Re: Urgent Payment Confirmation:


Jennet Michael,

Yes, that sounds like a good idea. I am sure that Mr. Jerry will know
how to take care of my money. And besides, it's fine with me if he pays
the $198.00 courier fee.

Once I get the money, I will more than pay him back.

In fact, if you send me your bank account number, I will wire a reward to you too -- I am so grateful of your honesty and willingness to connect me. I mean, in today's world, believe it or not, some people can't be trusted -- they would actually try to scam me out of my $5.5 million. They're not all honest like you and Mr. Jerry. Thank God for friends like you.

So yes, I give my permission for him to handle it.

Thanks for taking good care of me -- and remember, if you can get me your bank account info, I will have a nice reward for you too -- what do you say to $10,000 as a way of showing appreciation for all of your effort?


My wife's assessment of me:
You are incorrigible! :o)